Thursday, April 14, 2011

Are you training or do you run for fun?

That question I get a lot. It's so hard to answer it too. I do run for fun. I am also "training" for the marathon (or 1/2) as well. I say "training" because I am really not doing anything differnetly that I wouldn't normally do during any other week. I am not doing speed workouts, I am not following a training plan/ schedule. I am just running because that is what makes me happy, thats what keeps me healthy (mentally and physically) and that is just what I do and who I have become. Clearly I am not following a schedule because my training plan would be horrible. Take 4 weeks off before one half then take another week off, maybe run another 1/2 then 4 weeks later run another. Yeah I don't really know how that would work out. Good thing I'm not training! haha.

I usually answer the question on my running with an, "I run because it is the one thing that I selfishly do for myself that I love to do." It's honest and to the point. The fact that it keeps me healthy, at a good weight for my height and gives me a free boost of drugs (endorphins) to make me happy doesn't hurt either. I figure since I run so much I might as well get some racing bibs to hang on my wall while I'm at it and a few free t-shirts are nice too!

Another question I hate to answer: So when are you two having kids? Is it so wrong that I am too selfish that I don't want to give up my freedom? Yes, I feel like I am a horrible person because I am missing that "i can't wait to get married and have kids and my life will be finally complete" gene. I just never envisioned myself as a mother. I never imagined what it would be like to raise my own child, to be pregnant, and to hold my own baby after giving birth. I just haven't ever had that dream. I feel like people pity me and think, "poor Melissa. She doesn't want kids! How sad!" I don't know why people feel sorry for me. It was a choice. Not a choice made by my body but made by me, or I guess not made by me as I never really thought about it to make it a choice.

People also automatically assume that since I don't want kids, that I don't know what to do with them. Or that I don't like kids. Or that I will hurt them, or drop them, or do whatever. Nope. I am not retarded. I know how to hold a baby. I was a nanny for a baby and a 2 year old. They loved me, and I loved them. It was fun. However, at the end of the day I could go home, stay up late and then sleep in. They weren't my kids and if I didn't feel like it, I didn't have to go that day. Nanny's get sick days. Mom's don't.

I don't know how my friends who are moms do it. Paula runs every morning before her daughter V wakes up. She then goes home and is a mom all day long. Just listening to stories from my friends makes me tired, and I am not even doing anything. I am just listening to what they have to do everyday. I cannot give moms and dads more credit. In my eyes they are amazing. Superheros. Yes of course sometimes the stories makes me jealous. Taking a nap during the day and snuggling with a warm little midget next to you. Or listening to the things that a four year old comes up with and cracking up and peeing my pants because it is so innocent and so brilliant all at the same time. I do like kids. I just have never thought I would have my own.

So for all of you reading this blog, please do me a favor. Stop asking me these two questions. I hate answering them, and I hate the look of utter craziness when I say that I run for fun and the look of pity when I say that having kids for my husband and I aren't on our radar and in our hand of cards. I would greatly appreciate it! Thanks for reading my rant. I promise after today the mileage tracker for this month will move and more running stories will be added. Thanks for not un-following me!


4 comments:

  1. So can I say... will your kids train or run for fun...? Melissa you are amazing for who you are and knowing what you want in life! Xoxo

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  2. I'm right there with you! I hate it when people tell me that running is bad for my knees. I just want to tell them that the extra weight they're carrying around is worse for their knees than running. And once you have one baby, all you'll ever here is "When are you two going to have another baby?" Seriously people, stopping asking me this!

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  3. Um, really embarrassing spelling error up there. HEAR not here. That's just the sort of thing I would laugh at someone else for doing. Whoops, and I was an English major.

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  4. aw haha. Yah | always get the "when are you going to get married" question. We have been together for 7 years. Do we really need the wedding to prove anything?!

    I want to wait longer to have kids and be READY too. I don't want to rush into anything! Because once you have kids, they are your life!

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